Denver Public Works considers those dockless scooters seemingly airdropped into the city by a mysterious cabal "toys" and as such - despite their top speed of 15 mph - should only be on the sidewalks.
That may sound confusing, especially if you read the sticker on the Bird scooters that list rules including: "No Riding on Sidewalks."
"When it was brought to our attention that Bird had those stickers, we talked to them and we did not want them contradicting with our program, so Bird is working on it and they are creating new stickers," said Denver Public Works spokeswoman Heather Burke.
9NEWS checked with Public Works just to be absolutely sure after seeing the rules inside the Lime app that specifically say you CAN'T ride a scooter on a sidewalk.
In other news, the Bird app actually has a "local rules" section at the end of its rules when you go in the app that says you can ONLY ride on the sidewalk.
Both apps warn you about "local" rules when you unlock a scooter for the first time - but as much as company and city officials wish... people don't always read the instructions.
Heather Burke, the public information specialist for Public Works, re-confirmed with me that these e-scooters are only to be ridden on sidewalks.
You heard that right. Doesn't matter if you're in the destroyed-sidewalk-mess of Capitol Hill or super close to City Park's trails - you keep that scooter on the sidewalk and on the sidewalk ONLY.
At least for now.
See, the city openly admits these rules are still being fine-tuned. When the scooters arrived in late Spring in droves - without city staffers having any time to prepare - the app's rules were basically "ride these things in the bike lanes!"
When Public Works started scooping them up from streets and charging the companies a couple hundred dollars to reclaim them, Bird and Lime offered to actually negotiate and work with the city on applicable rules.
"We're still navigating through state and local law, to find a way to allow the scooters in the bike lanes, but we're not there yet," said Burke. "These are revocable permits, so it's really in the operators best interest to educate their users on how to properly ride."
In addition to riding safely, the city and the two companies are really pushing riders to park the things out of the way. The city, on its website, would prefer riders to leave the scooters near transit stops or bike racks.
Of course, that doesn't stop the occasional rider from just tossing the things into the grass on the Capitol Building lawn or just in the middle of a sidewalk.
If you're a Lime or Bird user, and you like the scooters, encourage everyone you know to follow the rules. If they don't, the city could get rid of them completely - and THEN how will you get from Thump Coffee back to work at your startup in LoDo?
Also, wear a darn helmet.