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We need to unpack this video of the effort to weigh Jayloe (the anaconda at the Denver Zoo)

She's 15.5 feet long, 165 pounds and 100% fabulous.

DENVER —

While it’s completely fair to say that under no circumstances should you EVER ask a woman’s size and weight, visitors at the Denver Zoo have allegedly been constantly asking this question about Jayloe.

If you can’t tell by the spelling alone, “Jayloe” does not refer to actress and singer Jennifer Lopez, but instead a Jenny from the Denver’s reptile block … specifically, the zoo’s green anaconda. 

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Recently, when Jayloe moved from one habitat to another, the zoo borrowed multiple brave employees to gather some data about this really, really big snake. 

Before we go any further, it’s worth mentioning that Jayloe was sedated and intubated during the procedure, so no one was at risk for any retaliation for weighing her without her express consent (she’s a svelte 165 pounds and 15.5 feet long). 

Moving on … 

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The zoo posted a 30-second video of what it took to move Jayloe, which you can watch below. Here are some highlights: 

This guy who is basically all of us were we to handle a 15.5-foot snake 

These very awesome aprons 

"Please don’t move …" — this brave zoo employee, probably

Here are some fun facts about our girl Jayloe:

  • Green anacondas are the largest snakes in the western hemisphere and the heaviest in the world, with males growing up to 25 feet long and weighing 550 pounds. Females are much longer than the males. 

  • While anacondas eat large animals ranging from deer to dogs to turtles in the wild, at the zoo, Jayloe mainly eats rabbits. 

  • Anacondas can give birth to up to 100 live babies at once! These are about 2 feet long and can care for themselves within hours of birth. 

  • An anaconda can eat up to 300 times its daily food requirement in one meal (honestly, same).

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